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Religious Book Store > Religious books beginning with W
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Why Men Hate Going to Church |
Author: David Murrow
Published: 2005-03-22 |
List price: $14.99
Our price: $11.99
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As of: December 03rd, 2008 07:03:07 PM
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Customer comments on this selection.
 Why Men hate going to church
This book pointed out how normal I was about what I would be feeling in normal church services and also how the average church operates. Men want varianceof presentations, they are not into touchy- feely minsitries that most churches have and that is why so many women are involved and not men. Highly reommend this book to pastors and leaders of the church so they may tap into the opportunies that men serve in their churches.
Essential book to read if in church ministry of any type
This book is important to read, don't take it for granted that you already know what it is about. It is an easy read, full of excellent information to use immediately.
Where has this book been?
I have noticed since I was too young to remember that men, real men were missing from the church but I never knew why until I read this book. I believe strongly that he has hit the nail on the head in this book. Not only does he give reasons why men have left or have never come back to the church, he gives us helpful advice to get them back. Its one thing to point out a problem, its entirely another to give solutions. I find this book to be very helpful in fulfilling my purpose and calling. I will use this book in my future church plant and in leading my current mens group. Thank you David for this wonderful spirit lead book.
 Typical Christian Pop-Fluff
I was required to read this book for a Church Planting Course I am taking. I was a little suspicious when this book came up as required reading for a church planting course. I had previously heard an interview with the author on radio and after having listened to it, I made up my mind that it would not be a book I would want to read. So I find myself having to read the book because of course requirements. I thought perhaps because since the book was required reading for the course, that I should not judge a book by its cover. I gave it a shot. The book rings true to the authors radio interview. It did not fail to disappoint.
In response to the papers objective in "How this book may be an important consideration in planting a new church", I would have to take the position that there is anything of little importance, and perhaps serves more to illustrate what one should not do in planting a church. Although the author makes several points that may be useful, the line of reasoning that he uses to arrive at these conclusions is extremely incoherent, irrational and without basis to any Biblical model of church planting. There is hardly a logical or consistent thought throughout the book. He writes extremely emotionally which ironically by his own definition is a feminine characteristic. - but of course, he is writing to women.
In my view this book is extremely harmful and contributes to the poor state of our churches of our day. He immediately qualifies in the beginning of the book that he will not often refer to scripture, - that the book is admittedly written to appeal to a female audience. The title of the book no doubt will ring a cord with women married to men who are absent from church and who are desperate for information on how to fix their husbands. Towards the end of the book however, Murrow warns women not to try to fix their husbands. ????
The author makes an observation that can be agreed with in a general sense, in that there is a lack of male attendance, participation in the modern church. This is of course what the book is about and he spends great lengths to fortify this message. He also makes the point that the church should focus on building up men in the church. Good point, but the methods he suggests are built on opinion, feeling and the wisdom of man rather that looking to any Biblical wisdom or scriptural references regarding the discipleship of men and their roles in the church and family.
His idea of masculinity is quite frankly preposterous. (Note: the author also mentions he had many refusals from publishers to publish his book - Huh). He basically describes the sinful character of man - which he describes as true masculinity, and the wonders why these men are not in church. They are not in church because they are sinners and are uncomfortable in confronting God. Let's call a spade a spade. If we paint the walls camo and show videos of Rambo, we may get these guys to church, but they will be no more saved than if they stay at home watching the fight channel. Sin needs to be identified, repentance needs to occur, God and Jesus need to be put in the proper place in these mens hearts and in the church and then maybe they would have a chance for true salvation. The church is doing a great disservice to the unsaved macho men by telling them it is ok to accept Jesus on your own terms. It leads them to an illusion of saving faith which is not true salvation. Following his suggestions may permanently isolate a man from truly accepting Christ. The author claims to preach the hard truth, but what he is preaching is the wisdom of man, he doesn't even come close to the hard truth. Biblical manhood is never addressed. If masculinity is his issue, he does not suggest that we learn from scripture the successes and failings of the triumphant and godly men of the Bible - he makes the claim that men don't read and don't like to read so you needn't burden them with requirements to read scripture!!!!
He boldly claims his goal is to call the church back to men - which is upside down. The church should never stoop to appeal to the sins of man. But at the conclusion of the book, he reasons that maybe church is not a place for men any way. Perhaps they are better served in small group Para church ministries? Well wasn't that the point of the book, to get men into church? - what is it then??
The author mocks those men that are faithful and obedient and never mentions the development of the men already in Church. In fact he berates them as spineless sissy-pants. Given also that he maintains later that men need strong Christian men to follow, where does he propose they come from? Perhaps if the beer swilling, cussing philandering men could come to church we may follow them? Would it not make sense to develop seasoned Godly men to lead those in their walk?
He confuses evangelism and discipleship. It is not clear whether the men in the book he is trying to get to church are saved or unsaved. In some sense one gets the idea that they are saved men who can't be bothered to come to church because it isn't fun enough, or it doesn't meet their needs or it isn't relevant. If that is the case then shame on these men. Making church fun won't get them there either. Are the men sitting at home non-believers? Then what he suggests may work in getting them to come to church. In his view you must make church more appealing than golf, hunting or sleeping if you want them to come. I.e. appeal to their sin, don't challenge or convict. Focus on their needs. One could have a long debate about whether Sunday morning is a time to evangelize. I would take the position it is not. The authors approach does not work, has not worked and is a rehashing of the seeker sensitive, needs based philosophies made famous by Saddleback and Willow Creek. It gets a lot of people in, but fails to develop mature Christians - Murrow cites these models as laudible successes. i.e. numbers = success - again wisdom of man.
He also focuses a great deal on putting men into responsible positions - giving them tasks. Which men are these? Are these the sissy pants or the beer swillers? Does putting them on the building committee save anyone? Is a man qualified to teach if he doesn't even know a shred of scripture?
Murrow employs a large use of statistics and results of studies in an attempt to give credence to his conclusions and suggestions. The data is deliberately chosen to support his view, his view is not derived from the data. To quote Shakespeare "me thinks he doth protesteth too much". The conclusions he arrives at are completely arbitrary, for example, many stats are given for the disproportionate number of men attending church compared to women. His conclusion is that men do not attend church because it is a "feminine" environment. Now, he makes an assumption that the church is a feminine environment. Assuming his assumption is correct, would not an equally valid conclusion be that the church has become "feminine" because of a lack of male presence? This illogical pattern of "reasoning" (if one could call it that) is consistent throughout the book.
I believe that this book if taken to heart will do more harm to the cause of church planting, evangelism and God's church, than any possible benefit. It follows the pattern of many "What is wrong with Church" books. It presumes on mans reasoning and wisdom for the solution but this line of reasoning is what got us into this problem in the first place and serves to further us deeper in the mire.
The one thing that Murrow has identified is that there is a shortage of Godly men. He asks the question as to why this is, and this is perhaps the only thing that can be taken away from this book. His methodology on identifying the causes and suggesting a remedy is to look to the wisdom of man and appeal to his sin. This book would encourage me to do otherwise by its error, and seek the wisdom of scripture and God's word for answers to the question.
Murrows book maybe useful in generating a reaction, but so does a stink-bomb.
 A little overboard, but some good statistics and content
The writer has an interesting style. I like the way he breaks down the chapters into subsections and uses lots of illustrations. He shares some good statistics and recommendations. But he tends to accentuate differences for emphasis. I am not convinced that every observation is valid, but enough of them make sense that I plan on sharing the book with several people.
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